I went to the movies with my friend Dianne.
She just had time to watch one movie
before her radiation appointment.
They cut her cancer out.
Now they are poisoning her pelvis
to make sure that no feral cells will ever grow there again.
After the film she turned to me and said
“All those women in that movie were beautiful.
Now I am older I have an eye for the beauty of older women.”
So I told her about the morning in the bathroom with my husband
after I finished with the moisturiser and he was drying himself
I said to him, “Its hard watching your beauty change
from one kind of beauty into another.”
I said that because I knew he would not want to hear me
going on about my aging neck.
On the train home three school girls were giggling
because one had chip crumbs on her face.
I thought that there are years in your life when almost everything is funny, followed by years in your life when almost everything is sad.
The schoolgirls stopped laughing
all looked to the other end of the train to see if Adam was on the train.
Then they could not decide if the boy they could see was him or not
and if he had a mono brow.
A discussion followed about all the Sam’s they knew.
Snobby Sam, Skateboarding Sam, Sam who has bad teeth
and that other Sam they met on the train the other day.
When I got off at my station
I felt the bite of the summer sun
I wished I had my straw hat or brolly.
Both of which I bought at DJ’s when we were in the money.
I walked past the house where the guy deals
in motor parts out of his front yard.
He is grey as he is permanently covered
in a thin layer of oil and grease.
He wears a blue shearers singlet.
My daughter calls those singlets wife beaters.
But he has not got a wife
unless she is tied up down the back like a dog.
His house with a sour sob garden shows no sign of a female presence.
It has wire mesh on the windows in the place of curtains.
From the outside the interior looks black
as if it is covered in grease too.
We call him Mr Escort Agency
as there was a time when he was only wrecking Escorts.
Now it seems to be short wheel base Toyos.
I am writing this in the style of Amber
because I like her.
I want to know what it feels like to write in this way.
Some say it needs editing
but to me it’s like being hooked
into someone’s brain following the path of their direct thoughts.
If anyone asks me why I am doing it
I am going to say I am finding my voice
but I know that is bullshit.
What I am really doing is trying
on the style for a while to see if it fits
or if I need to let it out or take it in like a seamstress.
On the other hand I could steal it.
I am descended from thieves.
She just had time to watch one movie
before her radiation appointment.
They cut her cancer out.
Now they are poisoning her pelvis
to make sure that no feral cells will ever grow there again.
After the film she turned to me and said
“All those women in that movie were beautiful.
Now I am older I have an eye for the beauty of older women.”
So I told her about the morning in the bathroom with my husband
after I finished with the moisturiser and he was drying himself
I said to him, “Its hard watching your beauty change
from one kind of beauty into another.”
I said that because I knew he would not want to hear me
going on about my aging neck.
On the train home three school girls were giggling
because one had chip crumbs on her face.
I thought that there are years in your life when almost everything is funny, followed by years in your life when almost everything is sad.
The schoolgirls stopped laughing
all looked to the other end of the train to see if Adam was on the train.
Then they could not decide if the boy they could see was him or not
and if he had a mono brow.
A discussion followed about all the Sam’s they knew.
Snobby Sam, Skateboarding Sam, Sam who has bad teeth
and that other Sam they met on the train the other day.
When I got off at my station
I felt the bite of the summer sun
I wished I had my straw hat or brolly.
Both of which I bought at DJ’s when we were in the money.
I walked past the house where the guy deals
in motor parts out of his front yard.
He is grey as he is permanently covered
in a thin layer of oil and grease.
He wears a blue shearers singlet.
My daughter calls those singlets wife beaters.
But he has not got a wife
unless she is tied up down the back like a dog.
His house with a sour sob garden shows no sign of a female presence.
It has wire mesh on the windows in the place of curtains.
From the outside the interior looks black
as if it is covered in grease too.
We call him Mr Escort Agency
as there was a time when he was only wrecking Escorts.
Now it seems to be short wheel base Toyos.
I am writing this in the style of Amber
because I like her.
I want to know what it feels like to write in this way.
Some say it needs editing
but to me it’s like being hooked
into someone’s brain following the path of their direct thoughts.
If anyone asks me why I am doing it
I am going to say I am finding my voice
but I know that is bullshit.
What I am really doing is trying
on the style for a while to see if it fits
or if I need to let it out or take it in like a seamstress.
On the other hand I could steal it.
I am descended from thieves.
No comments:
Post a Comment